Deesca
Deesca is a relationship mediator app for iPhone. You and your partner each give your side of an argument, together in a private shared room or with you describing both, and Deesca returns a Peace Treaty: what each of you needs, the common ground you already share, and one specific next step. It doesn't pick a winner, and it's free to try.
How online relationship mediation works
- Start a mediation. Describe what happened, typed or spoken. One specific moment works best: "last night at dinner," not "always."
- Add the other side. Either write your partner's side as fairly as you can, or open a shared room and send them a six-character code. They join on their own iPhone and write their side privately. Neither of you sees the other's words.
- Read your Peace Treaty together. It shows what each of you is really asking for, the ground you share, and one step you can take next. Then take it to your Relationship Coach if you want to keep talking it through.
What's in a Peace Treaty
What each of you feels
The need underneath each side, in calmer words than either of you used in the moment.
Your common ground
The things you already agree on, which a fight tends to hide. Usually more than you'd think.
Tension, objectivity, resolution
A quick read of how heated things are, how balanced the accounts are, and how close you are to resolving it.
One next step
A single, specific thing to try, not a list of promises. Small steps get done.
Why a mediator, not a judge
Some apps tell you who's right. That can settle a debate, but the person who "lost" usually stops listening, and the same fight comes back next week. Most recurring arguments aren't about who's correct. They're about a need on each side that hasn't been heard. A mediator's job is to make both needs visible and find a step that respects them, so Deesca never declares a winner.
An app, a human mediator, or a couples counselor?
A relationship mediator app
For everyday conflict and communication: the recurring argument, the message you don't know how to answer. Available at 11pm, private, and free to try.
A human mediator
For formal agreements, such as separating, co-parenting or dividing property. Deesca is not for legal or divorce mediation.
A couples counselor
For problems that have lasted a long time, betrayal, or anything involving fear. A trained professional can do what an app can't. Read Do we need couples counseling?
Using more than one
Many couples use an app between counseling sessions, to practise what they learn and handle smaller conflicts on their own.
Private by design
- Your partner never sees your words. In a shared room, you each see only the guidance that comes back.
- Not used to train AI. Your text goes to Anthropic's Claude, and voice notes to OpenAI for transcription, under terms that don't let them train on your content.
- No ads, no selling data, and one tap in Settings deletes everything. Details are in our Privacy Policy.
Try the relationship mediator
Free to try on iPhone, in English, German, Spanish, French, Italian, Portuguese and Turkish.
Common questions
Is there an online relationship mediator?
Yes. Deesca is a relationship mediator app for iPhone. You can describe both sides yourself, or invite your partner into a private shared room so each of you writes your own side, and get a Peace Treaty with one next step.
Can my partner join from their own phone?
Yes. Open a shared room and send them the six-character code. They join on their own iPhone with their own account, and neither of you sees the other's words, only the shared result.
How much does it cost?
You can try one mediation for free. Premium unlocks unlimited mediations and the rest of the app; you'll see the price in your own currency in the app before you pay.
Is it for divorce or legal mediation?
No. Deesca helps with everyday conflict and communication between partners. For separation, co-parenting or property agreements, use a qualified human mediator or lawyer.
Does it work for married couples?
Yes. It works for any couple, whether you're dating, living together or married.